Meaningless Failure

i am listening to Journey

while I produce sonnets

like a damn factory

churning them out;

my life has no meaning

But I am happy for the time being;

‘don’t stop… Believing ‘…

why do they pause

before ‘believing?’

just for the rhythm

or is there some deep meaning

hidden?

my sister called and cried,

she thinks she’s a failure;

her company was downsizing

and axed her;

i am happy she’s coming back home

and I think she’ll be happier too;

she’s not a failure

but I can’t make her listen;

it is ironic that I

who have lived in near solitude

for half a decade

can’t shut my own mouth

when I’m forced to be in company,

and she

living out there

hesitates to say to a stranger

‘Hey there.’

This post needs metaphors

to turn it into a poem…

my life has done a 360

from failure to failure

a cycle of nothingness

meaningless

existence

but I am happy

while writing my series of sonnets

About the mighty Kar-Tikan

(Hope you all had a good day… It has been a quiet one for me… And I am super bored.)

Wings

I was once a mighty dragon
But my wings had not yet grown
Slain dead before I could have flown
Now I’m a little humming bird
Darting everywhere, there, here
I still dream my dragon dreams
While flitting over lakes and streams
Oh, to just be happy with my lot
And enjoy my flight with what I’ve got

Fated to Grieve

I notice

The Universe

Trying to push me

In one direction :-

Grief!

I’ve noticed

About a dozen different events

Lately

That remind me

Of my loss

What does it hope to achieve

After more than a decade

Of acceptance?

Is he up there somewhere

Reminding me

Not to forget him?

I blink back tears

Circles

Circles everywhere I look
Look at the repetition of days
Days are but numbers on a calendar
Calendar art is popular in India
India is stuck in the past
Past glory is but a memory
Memory that is often distorted
Distorted values set by temporality
Temporality is an illusion
Illusion doesn’t let us spiral
Spiral outside the circle

Fear

Irrational fears

Plaguing my mind

Worries big and small

Filling me with dread

Thoughts of someone’s suicide

Triggered by my writing

A bullet of imagination

Faster than light

My panic deepens

Even though there was nothing

My mind can’t stop creating

Phantoms and prison cells

A/N: I never know if my writing is going to trigger a bad reaction, which is why I try to censor the darker things going on in my head. This blog doesn’t have many subscribers, so my worries are much less when I post things here.